January: Suicide Tuesdays

January is a short month for journaling, mostly colored by Jessica’s terrible New Year’s Eve and its subsequent fall out.  It’s not surprising that Jessica chooses New Years to be the peak of her rebellious teenage activity; it is the one -year anniversary of her famous New Year’s Eve disaster date with Marcus.  Although she blames the ecstasy for her problems with Len, I think that Jessica would have ended up in the same position anyways.  She wants to have sex, and she wants to have sex with Marcus, but will settle to have sex with Len, the less scary option.  It’s her opinion while she’s high, it’s her opinion on her birthday, and it’s the opinion that fuels her incredible speech in health class.  Our feelings have a way of pushing through to the surface.  Jessica thinks January is her come-down from the high, but really it’s the rest of the novel.  She now knows what she wants and she’s starting the scary and slow process of letting herself have it.  

Nothing more tonight — my laptop is currently being too slow and far too annoying. 

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One thought on “January: Suicide Tuesdays

  1. I always block out how terrible this New Years is for Jess. But I really enjoy her interactions with Scotty in this section.

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